By Taryn Doherty-Majewski, OD
‘Tis the season for dry eyes, last-minute insurance rushes, contact lens emergencies and every patient who suddenly must get in before December 31st. Professionally and personally, this is one of the most demanding months of the year. And for those of us who lean toward people-pleasing or perfectionism, December has a way of amplifying every anxious instinct we already work so hard to manage.
So, this month, I’m keeping things simple. No complicated self-improvement plan, no overachieving holiday mindset. Just three small practices that help me take back my power, shut down the anxiety spiral and protect the joy that’s so easy to lose this time of year. If you need that too, I’m writing this for you… and for me.
1. Put down the to-do list and have some FUN.
This is the tool I resist the most, which also means it’s the one I need the most. When we’re stuck in hyperdrive or clinging to control, fun feels frivolous. And if I’m being honest, I often feel like I don’t deserve fun because I have things to do and goals to reach. But fun is grounding. It interrupts the mental checklist, lowers the emotional temperature and reminds us we’re human before we’re clinicians, employers or holiday hosts.
Try something small:
- Wear something silly, sparkly or festive to clinic or Friday night dinner. After a long day in clinic and with plans to host friends, I convinced my (reluctant) husband to join me in trying this out to shake off the holiday fatigue and embrace some festive fun. Picture four fully grown adults in ridiculous holiday headbands. We ended up laughing and connecting in a way that softened the whole week. It’s surprising how much joy a little silliness adds.
- Bring a game, scavenger hunt or craft to holiday gatherings to break the “sit and wait for dinner” monotony.
- Try a new recipe, cocktail or mocktail on a night in, especially if social media makes it look like everyone else has plans but you. Celebrate your own company.
If you need more ideas or just want to talk about why fun might feel uncomfortable, my email is below. I’d love to connect.
2. Practice simple (and yes, slightly selfish) gratitude.
This season, I’m focusing on the things that make my life easier, not bigger. Perfectionists often overlook the simple gifts that keep life steady. I know I do.
For me, that looks like:
- No travel this year (bless the “first time homebuyers” budget).
- Predictable clinic hours that let me leave work at work.
- Those rare moments when I slip into the present: couch snuggles, reading my book by the fire or simply giving myself permission to exist. Rest is complicated for perfectionists and people pleasers, so I’m honoring the growth in learning to pause and do absolutely nothing, even in the busiest time of year.
These aren’t grand or poetic, but they anchor me. Let your gratitude be uncomplicated.
3. Give up one chore, guilt-free.
This month, I stopped making my bed. I traded those few minutes for sitting with a warm cup of coffee and my journal, letting my nervous system breathe before the day begins.
As perfectionists, we cling to tiny rituals because they create the illusion of “holding it all together.” But during a season of extra demands, something’s gotta give, and it shouldn’t be your joy, your heart or your mental well-being.
Let the sheets wrinkle. Just for a few weeks. You can smooth them out in January.
That’s it: 1) Fun. 2) Simple gratitude. 3) Drop one chore.
As optometrists, this truly can be the busiest time of year. As people-pleasers and perfectionists, it can also be the loneliest or most overwhelming. Let’s not let that happen. Not this year.
We’re in this together.
Happy Holidays and Happy New Year. May this season bring you rest, joy and the space to feel fully human, both in your work and in your life beyond it.
Connect with Dr. Doherty-Majewski here.
Read more health and wellness content from Dr. Doherty-Majewski and WO here.
